My Sugar House Life: Strollerless parenting

Everyone knows that there is a lifecycle to parenting. It starts with a tiny, beautiful baby that rocks your world and stuns you out of whatever self-centered slumber your single self had previously inhabited. You swiftly learn, and often embrace, that your life is not about you anymore. After babyhood, comes toddlerhood, which is, quite literally, the most exhausting job in the world. Toddlers, especially if you have more than one, will humble you in ways you did not think possible. It's beautiful chaos to be sure, the constant demands and mess softened by chubby cheeks, frequent milestones, unbridled potential, and the most authentic, uncomplicated love you have ever experienced. Toddlerhood is the refiner's fire of parenting, the crucible in which your future wise, unflappable self is created, but in the moment, well, it just feels like you're on fire.

I have had the privilege of living this lifecycle twice. Once unexpectedly as a 25 year old neophyte who had no clue what she was getting into and simply let love lead the way. And again as a slightly wiser 35 year old with considerably more resources, patience, and perspective. However, so as not to settle too comfortably into a life, I double downed and had two babies in two years. Mission accomplished. All the fire.

I bring up this lifecycle because I'm starting to feel on the precipice of a change; a new phase in my own parenting lifecycle. Harper starts kindergarten in a few short weeks and Ashton is a strong, independent three and a half year old who can barely be classified as a toddler anymore. Aidan, well Aidan gets his driver's license in a few weeks, but let's not even talk about that. It's too much. A few weeks ago, after a full day at an amusement park sans stroller, I realized if we don't need a stroller there, we probably don't need one anywhere. So I listed my four strollers (2 umbrella, 1 regular, 1 double) online. Then I added our pack n plays and high chairs. I almost listed my hiking backpack, which we haven't used all summer, but I just couldn't bring myself to get rid of it yet. Too many memories, and I'm not ready to admit I will never again feel Ashton's downy, sleepy head on mine as we bounce together rhythmically down the trail.

I feel it in other ways. I'm not exhausted all the time. I'm getting more cleaning done. I'm reading books, even serious ones that require some degree of mental exertion. I'm planning outings that occasionally go past 8:00 pm. We may not be at the staying up to watch fireworks phase, but we're getting there.

I don't always know how to feel about this. I love this phase, like I love every phase. I have so much fun with my kids that, as my dad always says, it should be illegal. They are now, undoubtedly, my favorite people to hang out with. But I'm also not ready to let go of our little world, which was all the more insulated during covid. I want to hold onto their sweet innocence and snuggles and declarations of love and preschool art that is almost solely devoted to their love of mama and all the wonderful things of 3 and 5. I've been through the refiner's fire of 0 and 2, 1 and 3, 2 and 4, and I am simply loving 3 and 5. I'm not ready yet for 4 and 6 which sounds, unbelievably like having two kids. Not babies. Not toddlers. Just kids.

Okay, enough pontificating. Some pictures from May - July 2021…

Getting ready picture from my brother's wedding where Harper was the flower girl.

Oh my gosh, so handsome. Braces come off this fall!

My whole family minus my nephews Zach and Nick.

Bob, Amy, and I did a sibling speech that slayed.

All spring I would pick my kids up from school at the U and we would scooter around campus for an hour or so. I love that my kids feel so at home on the beautiful college campus where I work.

St. Patty's Day

Harper is always giving Ashton these little meaningful touches. Hugs, kisses, holding hands. They are so open in their expressions of love for each other that I'm pretty much always on the verge of tears.

Mandatory COVID shot pic. Team Moderna!

More Easter Sunday

Hopefully this is the last masked Easter

I just know by next summer those round toddler cheeks will be a little less chubby so I squeeze and kiss them as much as I can.

Out to lunch with Aidan. He drove us there. NBD.

Aidan and Harper antagonize each other a lot (they are both nicer to Ashton), but at least they get along while they're asleep.

Huntington Beach

Learning to cut fruit.

Miller Park

Shaved ice and ice cream at Jolley's

Aidan's vaccination! Woot! 3/5 done.

Making kindness rocks at church

We swam at Uncle Rob and Uncle Brent's every Tuesday and Thursday this summer. Such an incredible gift to have a family pool nearby.

Playing with our friends in the backyard.

Harper's card for teacher appreciation week

That time Harper swore Ashton drew on himself but the perfect "A" on his forehead and drawings all over his back says otherwise.

The trains are running again at This is the Place. Hooray!

Pony rides

Woodland Biscuit Company on our way to hiking in Kamas. Highly recommend!

Nobblett's Creek

Made it to the creek! 2 miles in just under 4 hours. Not winning any speed medals here.

Strength medals? Maybe.

Ensign Peak

Bringing her "X" factor to the dental chair

Dinosaur Train in Midway

Compassion Camp at church

Silver Lake

Unexpectedly, Ashton was scared on the carousel at Hogle Zoo. He kept shutting his eyes really tight and holding onto that pole like his life depended on it.

Hogle Zoo splash pad

Every Wednesday night we do a preschool soccer night called "BioKicks." In reality very little soccer happens but the kids show good teamwork in the goal.

Ledgemere with our friends Max and Mia

Hyrum Lake with our besties the Gobles

THIS. This is what I am not ready to say goodbye to.

Burying our friend, Sawyer. By the way, at the age of 41 I have finally said goodbye to bikinis, and it is so liberating. Sayona to sucking in and endless crunches. This mama's got better things to do.

Preschool art

Fourth of July!

Our neighborhood does the cutest Stars and Stripes Parade. This year's Fourth felt extra special after what we've all been through over the past year and a half.